Pseudo-Indie #2: Shwayze

MEET SHWAYZE

This is NOT a scene from a Michel Gondry video.

This is NOT a scene from a Michel Gondry video.

*Play this as you read for the full Pseudo-Indie Experience. Download if you wish*

Shwayze – Polaroid

It took me longer than usual to write start this post because I really don’t know what I want to say about Shwayze. There’s just too much to hate. This is a man who lives the pseudo-indie life. He inhales air and exhales pseudo-indie. Look at his disastrously overdone pseudo-minimal fashion sense. Notice his pseudo-intelligent, pseudo-clever lyricism. Let this be known: If you have your own show on MTV, YOU ARE NOT INDIE. This kind of false indie appeal should be criminalized. His style of pseudo-indie-ism deserves a whole new category name: PSEUDO-HIPSTER HOP.

I don’t need to explain this. I’ll just post a few pictures and tracks of REAL hipster hop artists.

Who needs hideous colorful backgrounds?

Kid Cudi - He means biz-naz

Kid Cudi+Crookers – Embrace the Martian (Round Table Knights RMX)

Wale - His Hat is cooler than Shwayzes entire persona.

Wale - His hat is cooler than Shwayze's entire persona.

Wale – Good Girls

*NOTE: Yes I know that it is stupid to categorize people as being “indie” and “hipster.” I’m sorry if people use these words against you, but people see something negative about indie music in fashion because of CRAPPY artists like Katy Perry and Shwayze.

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8 Responses to “Pseudo-Indie #2: Shwayze”

  1. Can you do a “I hate what you like” for Li’l Wayne? And his sudden skinny jeans (baggy skinny jeans, gotta keep that hard rep), and keffiyeh and wayfarers. Unless you like Li’l Wayne, then I’m out of ideas.

  2. waldofaldo Says:

    Jon, Pat and I LOVE Lil’ Wayne. He’s one of the few mainstream rappers that can actually RAP. So no dice on that one. The other one you asked for was pretty much covered in IHTTYL: Your Cool Weather Accesories.

  3. that polaroid song is stinky
    ‘coulda been a Ménage à trois but she never heard my song before’?
    wtf?
    i’ve had wet dreams with more potential.

  4. i dont see where your going with
    wale has features with shwayze and kid cudi
    wale is my favorite artist next to kanye and jay-z

  5. T Flannie Says:

    I suppose the block shall remain hot from hereth until forever.

  6. HAHAHAHA!! Look at how loose Shwayze’s jeans are!

    What a fucking loser!!

  7. First off lemme say it was good talking to you on the show the other day Waldo.

    Wale is the SHIT. Have you heard the “Mixtape About Nothing”? Came out about 5 months ago…

  8. […] Let me be blunt: There is nothing indie/alternative/counter-mainstream about listening to Kanye West. Every Kanye full-length has gone platinum many times over, meaning EVERYONE likes Kanye, not just you eclectic indie/underground hip-hop enthusiasts. I honestly love Kanye’s previous work, but if you’re going to choose any album NOT to purchase this holiday season, let 808s and Heartbreak be the one. These two tracks are some of the finer parts of the album, which isn’t saying much at all. The first features the up-and-coming Kid Cudi […]

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